We often talk about motherhood like it’s one big, beautiful identity. But the truth? It comes in stages. Being a mother at 25 doesn’t look the same as it does at 55. The joys are different. The challenges are different. And most importantly, you are different.
Whether you’re barely surviving night feeds, navigating tantrums between work meetings, or watching and worrying over your grown-up child from afar, every stage of motherhood changes you, just as much as it shapes your child. This Mother’s Day, we spoke to six incredible women across different life stages, as they each reflected on what being a mother meant to them right now.
From newborn chaos to grown-up conversations, here’s what they had to say, and what we can learn from their journeys.
Stage 1: Take it one step at a time (literally!)
In those first few days, things can be very overwhelming. Everything has changed, but you don’t have the time to adjust (if this is how you’re feeling, here’s something that may be helpful). You kind of just have to get with the program. For Saima Rahman, a teacher and first-time mom to a 3-month-old baby boy, motherhood feels surreal. “It’s only been a few weeks, and honestly, it’s a roller coaster.” She compares her newfound motherhood to starting a project at work. “I tell myself, treat it like a project. Dive in. Figure it out as you go. And be proud of the little wins, even the ones no one else sees. You’ll find your rhythm in no time”
Plus, what helps her the most is not just focusing on the tough parts. “Everyone talks about how hard it is, and it is, but you’ve also got to see how rewarding it can be. Some moments are so special, they make you want to do it all over again. That part deserves some space in the conversation, too.”
Her best advice is to take things one baby step (literally!) at a time. “Self-care and me-time don’t exist much, but every day I steal an extra moment for myself than the day before. It’s not perfect, but it’s a start.”
Stage 2: Find balance in your own little ways
Once you’ve got a handle on things and you’re ready to step back into ‘normal’ life, balancing you-time and mom-time can be a challenge. For Khushboo Aggarwal, Founder & CEO of Zyla Health, the key to this balance is routine and rituals. “The best gift you can give your child is a volume of screen-free time. I’ve learned that distraction-free time is crucial. It helps avoid that dreaded mom guilt. I also make sure to plan weekends with fun activities, especially since weekdays can be busy with work.”
Whether it’s time with your child or with yourself, you have to remain honest to both, which is why she tries to remain consistent with her own rituals too! “My daily run, morning tea with family, and time with friends on weekends, that’s my recharge.”
Her ideology reflects in the idea of her perfect Mother’s Day gift as well. “A day with my kid, with zero distractions. That would make my heart melt.”
Stage 3: Be yourself and make mistakes, it’s all part of the journey
Eventually, you get to a point where you can no longer be everything to your child, you can just do your personal best. Co-Founder & CEO of Daalchini, Prerna Kalra’s idea of motherhood has evolved from doing everything to just being there. “It’s shifted from being the centre of my child’s world to being their strongest foundation. It’s no longer about perfection, but about raising self-reliant, confident little humans.”
Her advice to fellow moms? Let go of the pressure to be flawless. “Being a mom doesn’t mean being perfect or doing it all without mistakes. It’s about doing your best, being a strong role model, and raising an independent child who thrives on their own, not one who relies on you for everything.”
Mother’s Day is more than a day. “It’s a celebration of every kind of mother and their own unique ways of motherhood. There’s no right or wrong – just love and intention.”
Stage 4: Enjoy the fruits of your labour (pun intended)
When your children are old enough to be on their own, you have to let go and let the pieces fall where they may. For Abha Mehta, ex-Director at Barclays and now retired, her journey as a mother now involves the toughest, yet the most important lesson – to let go. “It started with pride in every little milestone. Now, it’s about stepping back so he can step forward with confidence and independence.”
This also gives her the time to be more of herself, something out of motherhood. “Now that I have the time, I’m rediscovering old passions – writing, public speaking, exploring new ideas. There’s peace in knowing my child is capable, and joy in finally having space to be me again.”
With her son living and working in the U.S., Mother’s Day is deeply personal. “It’s a day to honour the mothers we’ve become, and the sacred, evolving bond we share with our children.”
Abha’s message to other moms is simple but powerful: “Your child belongs to the future. Grow alongside them. Support, evolve, and most importantly, trust them with the values you’ve instilled, as that will outlast anything else.”
If you’re at this stage of motherhood, here’s another story that you may relate too!
Stage 5: Don’t lose yourself in the process
At 74, Humaira Rizvi carries the love of four generations in her heart. A mother of 4, grandmother to 13, and now a great-grandmother to 6 little angels, she strongly believes that the most important relationship you have is the one with yourself. “You have to become a mother to yourself first before you can do it for someone else.”
She emphasises how important it is to stop chasing the mom guilt. “You’re not supposed to give up everything. You’re allowed to have your own life too. Kids just need your love, safety, and presence. That’s enough. Don’t try to do everything.”
Her advice to today’s mothers is simple, but the most empowering. “You’ll never stop worrying. Even when they’re 50. So, don’t lose yourself in the process. Make time for your own thoughts, your own peace. You’re not just a mother, you’re a whole person too.”
Motherhood isn’t a role you master or a switch you flip on; it’s a journey you grow through.
What ties all these stages together? Not perfection. Just a deep, honest, evolving kind of love and the ability to grow right alongside your child. These stories are reminders that motherhood is as much about ourselves as it is about someone else. Through sleepless nights, proud milestones, heartbreaks, and homecomings, being a mom is a lifelong lesson in caring, letting go, and becoming more of who we are (more on this here).
What has motherhood taught you? Tell us in the comments. We’d love to hear your story.
